Cognitive dissonance

noun   PSYCHOLOGY

the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change.

I honestly think cognitive dissonance is one huge part of every human being that is not talked about often. You have it so do I.

One of the greatest thing about human being is that no matter if you are right or wrong, whether you lie or not, you will always tell the "truth" to yourself. This "truth" can be wrong in reality, but it is the actual truth from your perspective. And most importantly, this "truth" can be changed. Let's call this "truth", your honest friend. 

Case 1: Imagine a simple scenario, in 2nd grade class, the teacher told you that small numbers cannot be subtracted by large number:

x < y

2nd grade teacher's claim: 

x - y = not possible

Well, your honest friend remembers this. To him, this is x - y is not possible. You then arrive at 5th grade. With your honest friend of course. The teacher asks, what's 2 - 4 ? The honest friend said, that's not possible. To him, the "truth" is that 2 is less than 4, therefore not possible. The teacher's honest friend said, that's funny ... you can, its -2 . Now, the truth is -2, however your honest friend said that's not possible. In this simple scenario, your honest friend will change, and now understands x - y is possible for all real number, x ∈ R, y ∈ R , as the teacher is more knowledgeable and trustful. 

Case 2: Now, let's amplify the scenario. You are now educated, and debating another person. Let's call him Fact. Let's assume that Fact is in reality correct, and your honest friend doesn't know the reality. Let's play out the simulation:

Your honest friend:

A is not true, because of B, C

Fact:

A is true, because of D, E

Assumptions:

B, C => in reality false

D, E => True in reality

Well, as an educated man yourself, not even lying or twisting your honest friend's words, you say A is not true! Fact said A is true. Both of you and Fact gives the same number of evidence. It is much harder for you and your honest friend to accept the truth now, right? Let's say your honest friend did, finally found out his reality was wrong, and accepted Fact. But you didn't. You can lie to others, but your honest friend is finally right. First way: You kept insisting Fact is wrong, or second way: you can tell that you accept Fact is right.

Fascinatingly, in both ways, your honest friend will be the same.

In both Case 1, and Case 2, it involves dissonance with others, not you and your honest friend. With the binding result being that, your honest friend is now, correct in reality. 

Case 3: Dissonance with your honest friend, or Cognitive Dissonance. How? Your honest friend tells you that the chance of your startup succeeding in minimal, <8% . Why? Your honest friend saw that the industry sector of your startup is currently at the lowest, and other startups that did almost the same as yours, failed.

Your honest friend:

Your startup will fail, because of the past startups who did almost the same failed &

industry is at the lowest.

You:

Your startup will succeed, because of your startup being better &

potential growth in industry.

Reality:

Past startups => Failed, but worse than yours

Industry => Lowest, but will grow

Well, unlike Case 1 and Case 2, there is no reference or lying to fully understand who is right. In all scenarios, your honest friend is automatically assumed at the initial to be true, because it was taught to or have seen. This applies to this case, your honest friend is true initially. 

But unlike other cases, the only way your honest friend will find out the actual truth in reality would be doing what you claimed. Choosing the latter, or trusting your honest friend would mean one of two things. Limitation, or Following the truth. Just like the Schrodinger's cat, the only way to find out what's right is by doing it. 

Here's the best part:

If you chose "You", there's 2 ways, first: succeed, second: found out you're wrong.

But if you chose "Your honest friend", first: found out you're wrong, second: found out you're right.

Let me highlight it for you:

If you chose "You", there's 2 ways, first: succeed, second: found out you're wrong.

But if you chose "Your honest friend", first: found out you're wrong, second: found out you're right.

Another name for the second option, "Your honest friend" is called limitation. The first one, "You" is called trying. The cool thing about trying is that, if you miss, you don't miss out.